The Coaching Model

Part of my coaching process is to use a coaching model – a visual representation of how I coach. There are as many models as there are coaches. I alter my model to suit specific client needs. The benefit of having a model is that I am conscious of the process and can monitor the client’s success. Generally, here is the model I use:

Client: Issue/Goal -> obstacles -> priorities -> follow-through -> results!

Coach: listen, question, feedback, encourage

There are commonalities to many models that make them successful. The main thing that makes a model effective is when it supports the client. A coach is a valuable partner on the client’s journey, but ultimately, it is the client’s responsibility to move forward.

Setting Goals

Setting goals is a big part of finding success. I can drive all day and travel places, but I won’t reach a destination unless I first decide where I want to go! Once I set my goal, I need to get a map so I know how to get where I’m going.

Reaching a goal is easier if it’s SMART: specific, measurable, achievable, realistic, and time-based. If you can pinpoint exactly how to reach a realistic goal and you know when you want to reach it, you can meet your goal!

Sometimes though, we have goals that don’t align with our values. Perhaps we are following someone else’s idea of success and are doing what they value. In such a situation, it’s hard to meet a goal. Follow your own dreams, live your own values, and goals will be much more achievable. If you can find people to support and encourage you, you will have an easier time meeting your goals.

Reaching a goal is a process. Set milestones and break a big goal into bite-sized chunks. Reward yourself for small accomplishments along the way if a big goal seems out of reach.

One effective way that I reach goals is through a prosperity board. I gathered images that represent my goals and created a collage. I posted the collage in a prominent location so I could see it every day and not forget about my goals. I got to see my progress regularly and one by one, my goals were met.

The Coaching Process

Coaching is a process. Like any relationship, it has stages. Creating a coaching model has helped me explain how I coach and what clients can expect to put into – and get out of – coaching.

Once I am in a coaching session, I can use the tools and techniques of the coaching process to identify where in that process the client is. Depending on where my clients are, I can use specific tools to help them though.

At the beginning on the process, clients have a gap between where they are and where they want to be. Initially, as the process proceeds, clients feel empowered and motivated. Sometimes, however, clients are challenged and have internal struggles that might make them want to quit. Getting past the quitting zone is essential in helping clients reach their goals.

Ultimately, clients reach their goal and the coaching relationship comes to an end, either indefinitely or until the next goal is discovered.

Streams of Income

As I move into a full-time coaching capacity, I am realizing that there are a lot of different ways to generate revenue besides the main one-on-one coaching scenario.

By working smarter, not harder, I can focus on energizing myself and being in the best frame of mind when I am coaching. Some of the ideas that I will pursue are:

• Offering group coaching sessions

• Holding workshops

• Promoting affiliate programs (i.e.: selling recommended books)

• Creating a workbook that people can purchase online or in person

• Recording a CD that people can purchase online or in person

• Creating a tele-class that people can purchase online or listen to for a fee

Creating Confidence

Confidence is sexy, sure. But confidence is a valuable quality in all aspects of our lives. There is a difference between conceit and confidence. A confident person has the ability to move forward in life, knowing he or she has skills to overcome obstacles and meet goals. A conceited person talks about how great he or she is, but doesn’t do anything great.

It’s easy to compare ourselves unfavorably to others and come up short. This is not a confidence-building tactic. It’s better to look at yourself as an individual, unique in every way, and list your strengths. Writing a biography is a confidence-building exercise. I had no idea how established I was in a creative and professional sense until I listed my experiences on paper. Soliciting testimonial from clients also helped build my confidence and made me realize that I had a lot to offer.

When self-doubt arises, think about perspective and undertake a shift in how you think about yourself. There’s only one you. Enjoy yourself, and value who you are and you will gain the confidence to move through life successfully.

Creating Action

Just do it!

Creating action moves us forward in life. We can think about things all we want but until we start doing something, we can’t succeed.

Creating a goal is a great start but we need more than the idea of a goal to achieve success. Having people who support you is very important. Striving toward something you value is equally important. Think about times when you had people who believed in you. Did you meet your goals?

I like to reward myself at set milestones, not only at the completion of a goal. Sometimes a big or challenging goal must be broken into steps, each of which is achievable.

Game vs. Significance

Let’s have fun!

Have you ever been told to “lighten up”? When people told me that, I used to become defensive. But I’ve since learned that even important situations can be handled in a light, fun way. Creating a game and having fun can bring a joy to everyday events and reduce the stress associated with negative ones.

I once had a long list of documents to gather and prepare for immigration. Compiling letters, birth certificates, records of marriage, and tax information sounds less than fun. However, I turned it into a game. I knew I could gather the information; the stress was in the mundane aspect of it. So I made a list and played a matching game! Could I match up every item on the list with a corresponding document? Could I complete the list in a week? Could I gather the papers in alphabetical order? Get the marriage license before the tax records? Sure! And I made it fun.

I sometimes like to think of a worst-case scenario. Once I am aware of how bad things could be – and I know they won’t get that bad – then I can move forward in a light way, confident that I can handle any scenario.

Games can significantly alter one’s perspective. Try it. It’s fun!

Responding vs. Reacting

There is a profound difference between responding and reacting, but the difference might not be immediately apparent. Reacting is a reflex, like a knee jerk. Responding is a well thought-out action. All of us have a host of external influences over which we have little to no control over. Traffic jams, rude people, unexpected bills, troubles at work, and the list goes on. The good news is that we can choose how to respond to uncontrollable events.

If I am being bumped and shoved on the bus, I can react with annoyance, or I can respond by moving to another area of the bus, or by taking a less crowded one. I cannot always choose the circumstances of my life, but I can choose how I respond. And when I respond, instead of react, I feel a greater sense of control – over my own emotions and actions.

By being in control, I have an opportunity to reflect and assess. How do I feel about this? Why? With such insight, I can let go of negative emotions and move forward in life.

When you feel overwhelmed or bother by situations in life, it can help to make a list of what’s bothering you. Ask yourself what your reaction was to the event. Why do you instinctively react that way? What would be an appropriate response?

By making a list you can help yourself become more aware of what is happening around you. That awareness can help you change the way you deal with situations. You can learn to respond appropriately.

Respect vs. Invalidation

To respect someone is to hold them in high regard, and value them. Everyone can benefit from being treated with respect. When we don’t respect someone, we invalidate them – we treat them as valueless.

Sometimes people invalidate others if the other people hold different belief systems. Practicing a different religion or having an alternative lifestyle are some obvious differences. But there are subtle differences as well. Different ways of communicating, different fashion styles, taste in music, food, or hobbies are areas where people sometimes invalidate others. To truly respect others, we must value and appreciate our differences.

To respect others, I strive to be on time, to be polite and thankful, to listen, to withhold judgment, and to speak the truth. To respect myself, I honor my physical and spiritual needs, I eat well, I take care of my body, and I manage my time and finances in a way that lowers my stress.

To teach other to respect us, we must set personal boundaries and let them know what I will and won’t tolerate. I am working on strengthening boundaries by asking people to be punctual, truthful, and communicative.

What are your personal boundaries? How can you be respected and respect others?

Business Plan

Writing my business plan was a very exciting process! It really solidified things for me – I felt that this was a “real” business and its launch and success was imminent. Creating a vision, mission, and purpose was useful too. I’ll share them here:

Vision Statement – Life Coaching by Jean helps people with their goals and aspirations. I work from a home-based business and conduct coaching sessions by phone with clients from all walks of life.

Purpose Statement – I am a creative and wellness coach. I work with a variety of people. I help them expand their horizons, set and reach goals, and find clarity in life. As a result, they typically become focused, balanced, and follow their aspirations.

Mission Statement – To fulfill my vision and purpose, I have completed ICA’s coaching accreditation. I joined ICF and meet regularly with coaches in the Puget Sound chapter. I have launched a Web site and ordered business cards. I registered my name and business in the State of Washington. I have placed advertisements in local magazines, businesses, and online. I network and gain clients through word-of-mouth. I continue to learn about human nature, communication, and ways of growing so I can be the best person I can be, which will, in turn, help my clients.